Epic Living - Leadership Development Career Management Training Executive Life Coaching Author

The Two Paths to Great Leadership

            

Had a great conversation with Marc yesterday.  We spoke a lot about future plans with our two companies, but it was his brief statement below that made me pause:

    "You have two paths you can go on in this environment.  One says this sucks, and the other says I see an opportunity."

Those words cconfirmed mmuch in my heart. 

Even when things have been bad, I have gravitated toward optimism.  No applause needed here.  Many (family, friends, and associates) have come to count on me for looking up.  This hasn't always been easy.

Even in the times where I wondered if Epic Living would make it, I wrote from the perspective of optimism.  Why?  You don't need another source/media that communicates how bad things are-in my life or the world as a whole.  Believe me, this is not lofty fee-good babble.  It hurts me when people fall into the quick sandd of pessimism.

I know that many are experiencing difficult times right now.  But could these hard times be the preparation ground for your greatest opportunity?  I fear that many could miss it because of that quick sand I mentioned.  Pure gold can't come about without some intense heat.

The real battle is in our heads.

 

Making Urgency Real

 

I received an email today from a publicist at Harvard Business Press wanting to connect about John Kott'er's newest book A Sense of Urgency.  It didn't take me very long to respond, with excitement, about reviewing a copy.  After reading, I will post my thoughts on this blog.

John Kotter is brilliant and thoughtful.  He truly has impacted my thinking over many years. 

The above video provides some clues to how urgency connects to change.

Ready to Die, Ready to Live

In a speech yesterday I told a group of businesswomen that you're not ready to live until you're ready to die.  Easy for me to say, right?  Well...no.  Seal (see the clip above) has some poetic thoughts on the matter of dying.  But I don't want to stray to far from the meaning of this story.

It wasn't until I got serious about the things I couldn't see (love of family and love of people), that I starting confronting the urgency of this limited time offer call life.  I apply the idea to work too.

The businesswomen yesterday got my meaning.  Those truly passionate about what they do carry a sense of the ending.  People like this believe that the story titled our life has a beginning, a middle, and an end.  It clarifies and refines how we approach everything.

If we get close to this idea we might get the following:

• No more playing around with destructive words and behaviors.
• No need for the next generation of DVD technology.
• Dinner with the entire family every night.
• No more preoccupation with fame and fortune.
• Embracng the moment with all you connect with.
• Taking care of our bodies like the gift they are.
• Seeing people as more valuable than material goods.
• Taking responsibility for our lives.

Are You Passionate About Your Product or Service?

Giving a speech next week about the death of sales.  I'm looking forward to illustrating the importance of connection and community, over selling.  No more going through the motions, but saying with subtle force "this what I was born to do."

One of the key ways to measure your level of connection and community is your passion level.  Specifically, are you passionate about what you offer the world?  Are you someone who sees the dollars as a byproduct of what makes you come alive?  I find it sad that many organizations start with profit or create a product/service and then think passion is a given.

By the way crises are refiners and purifiers.  The question is whether you are willing to let it play out.

Here some clues to measure your passion:

• What are you willing to do for free?
• What are you willing to die (you're not ready to live, until you're ready to die) for?
• What has shaped your perspective, pain or pleasure?
• Who follows your lead?
• Is what your doing worth reproducing?

Take a look at this video to see someone who is very passionate about their craft.

Crisis: American Economy Style

If you want to know what your leader(s) are made of, now is the time to find out.  Who we really are is revealed in crisis.  If your industry/work is not experiencing a crisis now, don't worry you will and it will present the same opportunity.

Did You Mean My Life?

As I've watched my life twist and turn since I began Epic Living, I haven't always embraced the idea of where it was leading.  Maybe because of the surprises (good and bad) that have come my way. 

Ryan Bettencourt of Learn From My Life relayed a story to me, on the radio show, about Daniel Pink.  Daniel made it clear that life was not linear.  Instinctively, we would agree with him.  Who has had a life that lived straight?  Not me.

This past weekend the difference between my work and my life was illustrated vividly. 

I met people at a picnic that seemed to know me even though we'd never met.  Call it destiny or serendipity, but it was clear I was meant to connect.  God is a wonderful writer. So many of my experiences being honed to manifest something beautiful.  As mentioned before, I couldn't have predicted or scripted such encounters. 

OK, I know I'm being vague/cryptic.  The people I met were a part of an organization that I've agreed to help on a long term basis.  Obviously, I will reveal more at a later date.  But this post is not about me.  It's about you and your life.

If you spend your time (who knows how much you've been given) working on work, more than likely your life will evaporate.  Many are doing this now and fooling themselves into believing that a promotion or the number of direct reports validates.  It doesn't.  A simple deception that occurs with every tick of the clock.  By the way many employers are complicit here.

In the movie A Good Year, Russell Crowe's character Max is asked by the CEO what would he choose.  He said; "What'll it be Max, the money or your life?"  You could intertwine money and work on that statement.  Check out the movie and you'll know what I mean.

The following are some things to swallow regarding life and work:

•     Valuing life first will lead to success beyond your wildest dreams
•     Valuing life leads to redefining success.
•     Seeing work as a tool to find a great life is a wise approach.
•     Your employer will eventually struggle to remember you.
•     Those who love you are screaming (most of the time silently) for your attention.

Doing What You Love

The title of this post is near and dear to my heart.  I know that's not a surprise for many of you.

It's funny how things come full circle in life.  This piece from Marshall Goldsmith's blog is from an article he wrote for Fast Company a few years ago.  When I first read the piece, I was evaluating hard my future and whether what I was doing was a love affair.  I am pleased that I can bring it to you now. 

Marshall's words added much clarity to my journey.  I will be forever grateful.

How Fame Has Ruined the Game of Growth

"Depth of soul can never be measured by the eyes."

    - Author Unknown

Is depth of soul important as you seek to grow a life and career?  Does fame poison the journey?  I say yes to both.

Depth of soul is non-negotiable, unless you prefer to hang with the shallow crowd.  Besides who wakes up in the morning looking forward to a day of engaging with the shallow.  Fame can be poisonous if not handled well, and keep in-mind that fame is relative.  If you work in a 3 story building, fame is attainable amongst the group.

In the media (new and old) age we live in we've been seduced into believing that fame is something to grasp.  Even those who won't admit it long for the attention.  Maybe its the feeling of false validation that comes when people know "who you are."  Which, by the way, is such a contradictory idea. 

We forget that fame is a cost of doing business and not a barometer of how good we are at the game we play.  Not to mention the trade that occurs in the pursuit.  You can't have it all. 

Here some ways fame has ruined the game of growth:

• In the old media days you needed to know what you were good at.  Fame in the new media world says; "everyone's invited."
• We bought the lie that the famous are as wonderful as an airbrush can create.  We connect without knowing anything about person.
• Fame made us long for comfort, which is a mortal blow to a life of growth.
• We didn't learn from the teacher named rejection.
• Fame convinced us to see validation from the applause.
• Fame, like money, caused us to become a slave and not a master.

Conspiring Circumstances

 

Talked to my friend Robin this week and we discussed the idea of conspiring circumstances.  You know, the things in life and work that always seem to come up to mess up.  It used to vex me, but it doesn't any longer.

Some years ago, ironically, when I slaved in , I always saw circumstances as things that would eventually be eradicated (like polio or the black plague).  But my naive leadership ways kept me from understanding the role circumstances play in this motion picture called life.  Thankfully, I got older and wiser.  I began to understand that it would be better to expect conspiring circumstances, than to be shocked by their appearances.

The key is expecting them-really.  I'm not recommending paranoia or always looking over your shoulder.  But I am recommending a retro-view of your life to discover what part circumstances have played in the scenes of life.  Hopefully, you're the better for the experience.

We're so obsessed in our culture with being happy, being secure or arriving at some destination.  If you hold onto those desires, you'll be dismayed and sad when circumstances come on to thwart you.  Listen, I'm not saying that you can't be happy or secure.  Just remember the seasonal nature of things.

• It should be a new paradigm where you accept that there will be times of unhappiness (which can actually lead to greater happiness).
• It should be a new paradigm that says security is best found in risk, not some idea that you can set up controls to make life safe.
• It should be a new paradigm that says the ride is infinitely more important than the destination.  Focusing exclusively on the destination causes a missed life.

So the next time you get that promotion and the applause is uproarious, stop and remember how circumstances can, and always will, conspire as you make your way through.

Health Accountability

Matthew Scott over at The Life's Work Group posted this piece last week.  Matthew's challenge (see the video in his post) provides a great example of how to move from talking, to taking action.

Enjoy!